2010 VS. 2020

Once upon a time, my blog used to be my everything. My one and only hobby was blogging. I'm actually talking about 10 years ago which was when I started this blog. I sort of fell out of touch with it these past 2 years. 

However, I have been reflecting on my life recently. I remember a time when blogging made me feel comfortable and happy. Hence, I've decided to revisit that happy place. So, here I am now. 

I'm not too sure if this makes sense to any of you but I feel like not much has happened in the past 10 years but at the same time, so many things have happened that changed me and shaped me into who I am today. 

Whilst reflecting and looking back on my life and the events that happened since 2010, I've come to realize 5 major things about myself and my life. To be really honest with you, even January 2020 seems like a distant memory - what more to say January 2010. But here we go.

2010 (I was about to start college)

1) I thought all the friends I had then will last forever. I've managed to build a small "fan-base". I had countless groups of friends. Whatever my friends told me seemed to have more power over what my family told me. I was obsessed with having many friends (just as a lot of teenagers out there, because the more friends you have, the more popular you are)

2) I was dating my brother's best friend, who is now happily married, actually. I used to think that dating was essential in life and that if I didn't have someone who adored me and loved me, I'm a complete and utter failure. 

3) I was helping mum out with business. I loved it when people would come up to us and asked us to choreograph some kind of dance performance. I would always pretend I was Britney Spears - singing and dancing. Secretly, I've always wanted to be in the entertainment industry. 

4) Music's everything to me. I would listen to new songs on MTV all the time. I would blast music while driving. In college, I had headphones on most of the time because I just can't be bothered with anyone. 

5) I had no idea what kind of future I would have. Everything was a blur. It was worse than a blur. I couldn't see anything. I felt scared most of the time because everyone around me seemed to have already planned what they wanted at what age and I was just a walking confusion, trying to exist and be someone my parents wanted me to be. 

Fast forward to this year. Obviously, besides the age factor, I certainly didn't see a pandemic happening.

2020 (embracing my late 20s)

1) My circle of friends have somehow shrunk immensely and I'm okay with that. I really do understand now when people say "You only need a few close friends in your life and you'll be fine." I've managed to keep in contact with a few people from high school and some close friends since 10 years ago. I've made a couple of new friends along the way who are just the most amazing people ever. And my family means almost everything to me now. 

2) I just got out of a turbulent relationship. I know now that sometimes, love alone is not enough. "I love you" can be said a thousand times in a day, but it's more of how someone makes you feel. I am happily single and I adore myself. In a way, I feel like I've gotten a tiny part of myself back.

3) Well, entertainment industry it is. Been on TV a few times, working in a radio station as a radio host, gone on stage to launch products, congratulated brides and grooms on their special days, speak on stage for a living. Wow. I sometimes can't even believe it myself. See, I am an MBA Finance graduate doing what I'm doing now. So, obviously, you don't always end up doing what you studied for in university and that is totally fine. 

4) Music is still everything to me. I just get to do it for a living now which is amazing. I still have headphones on most of the time. See, some things don't change. 

5) I can kind of see what I want for myself and I am working hard to achieve them. To be really honest, nobody really knows what the hell they are doing, me included. I'm still learning new things about myself everyday. But I've learned to live comfortably in my own skin. And even though my future is a blur, I don't feel scared anymore. I feel some form of excitement. Knowing the future would be boring because you already kind of know what to expect. So, I'm taking it as I go which is the amazing part.

Do you see what I mean by not much has happened but at the same time, I've grown into a different person?

Please take care and stay safe x